Enough

Most of my life I have felt one overarching feeling.  That is the feeling of not being enough: 

• Not enough to be loved. 
• Not enough to be wanted.
• Not enough for people to want to know me. 
• Not enough for people to want to be my friend.
• Not enough for good things to happen to me.
• Not good enough. 
• Not good enough to get the job. 
• Not good enough for that man to take an interest in me. 
• Not important enough to be heard.
• Not enough to add value to any circumstance or situation. 
• Not enough to be successful. 
• Not enough to be good at anything.  
• Not enough to be worthy of anything of value.

Just plain….not enough.  When ever I would encounter life and the question of my worthiness popped up, my mental reaction went directly to “I’m not enough.” Sadly, I spent most of my life in this battlefield that plagued my mind. I spent way to long thinking poorly about myself and not living up to the great potential that God placed in me from birth.

I always felt common and unimportant.  I looked down on myself and remember wishing to be normal.  Normal as in being as valuable as everyone else.

Today it seems sad to me.  Sad that I would waste a large part of my life not seeing life through the lens of who God believes me to be.  Not that I am sad.  I am not.  I am full of joy at this point in my life.  I only wish I had found my true identity in Jesus Christ earlier so I could have lived in that identity longer.

If you struggle with feeling not enough I hope you will pick up a copy of my book and God can speak truth to you through it.  I found out I was pretty valuable to God and I know you are too. You have great value.  You are uniquely created and made for royalty.  Let that sink into and begin to live like who you were created to be.