Have you ever felt hopeless? Does your internal dialog take you down the road of, “What’s the use? Admitting that things are adversely impacting you is scary. Taking steps to advance you towards change is even scarier. Sometimes things are hard and just seem impossible. The prospect of it being different can feel unrealistic and overwhelming. Discouragement takes root, and you begin to discount the idea before you even get started. When failure in the past has prevailed, it’s hard to remain positive about trying again. Deciding to do a new thing starts with the decision to try anew. But this time you have to do it with the positivity of…

Today, I just needed to speak what’s on my mind. Here we are, in the middle of a world wide pandemic, forced to be closed in our homes. Going on week… I don’t even know how long it has been now. But the truth is, close quarters has exacerbated what was already percolating inside of me. Right now, I am struggling emotionally. Right now, my marriage feels hard. Right now, life feels really difficult. Right now, all I can think about is where are the teachings in the church that shows how a good marriage works. Truth bomb… Christian woman I talk to have the same issues in marriage. We…

If you’re anything like me, you have spent the last few weeks reeling. Reeling from the constant COVID-19 news feed, breaking case news on TV and ever changing restrictions. Are you like me; trying your hardest to grasp the reality of confinement inside your house, feeling scared witless, constantly talking yourself down off the ledge of fear? My mind has been spinning. My heart has been spinning. My emotions have been spinning. And my anxiety has reached it’s peak. The past few weeks I have spent most of my time trying not to think about the pandemic, the death toll, the stock market crashing, the financial devastation and what it…

Life can be discouraging. It can beat you up, tear you down and ruin your day. One day happiness can be your mantle and the next day sadness, grief, stress or tragedy. Every day the imperfection of people has the the potential to cause difficulty in our world. Sometimes it feels impossible to navigate a road shrouded by smoke when you feel your world has caught fire. When the wind picks up, fans the flames of your contained fire and turns it into a raging circle of flames what do you do? What do you do when life feels unbearably hard? When you lose someone you love? When your swallowed…

The past few years a common thread has consumed my questioning. The common thread in my questioning is exactly what Satan tricked Eve with and tried to seduce Jesus with in the desert. Does God really have your best interest at heart? Is God really enough? Not that I actually asked that specific question. When my son was diagnosed with a heart condition, I asked why is this happening. What did we do wrong? Then again as I have accompanied my husband to chemo treatment for cancer I asked, what am I supposed to be learning from this circumstance? As I have watched my mother get weaker and struggle to…

In 2008 I started to write. I wrote because I had things that plagued my mind and tangled up my heart. I had things I needed to say, thoughts that needed a voice and emotions that needed expressing. That’s how I began, talking to Jesus and writing what pushed its way out of my soul. It was a compulsion of sorts. A dissertation of honest questing for answers to what quirked and twisted life around me. I just wanted answers from God about how to live in his presence, how to heal from the past and find joy in the now. I wanted to honestly share the hard stuff and…

Have you ever woken up when it was still dark outside and been completely confused to what time it is and where you are? Your mind starts asking questions like, where am I? Is this my room, my bed? Is it morning? Did I oversleep? In the first moments of waking, your mind isn’t completely alert and you struggle to figure out if what you are experiencing is reality or you’re just dreaming. Confusion fills your mind, which sometimes moves to fear. With complete consciousness and turning on lights, comes relief because you know where you are and what is happening. Life can also be like this. It can be…